


Apology Snippet

by terma_archivist



Category: Once a Thief (TV)
Genre: Mary Sue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2000-01-28
Updated: 2000-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:14:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26501215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terma_archivist/pseuds/terma_archivist
Summary: Note from alicettlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived atTER/MAand was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2019. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address onthe TER/MA collection profile.TER/MA January 2000 Challenge. This month I am going to do what I vowed I would never do.  I am actually encouraging authors to write a Mary Sue piece. This means I want the author to create a character which is a portrayal of themselves in the story.  It doesn't have to be an accurate portrayal, just a character that represents some part of yourself that interacts with the boys.  Often this gets done by accident in stories, so I am sure that we can do it on purpose. —Rowanne
Collections: TER/MA





	Apology Snippet

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alicettlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [TER/MA](https://fanlore.org/wiki/TER/MA) and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2019. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [the TER/MA collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/terma/profile).  
> TER/MA January 2000 Challenge. This month I am going to do what I vowed I would never do. I am actually encouraging authors to write a Mary Sue piece. This means I want the author to create a character which is a portrayal of themselves in the story. It doesn't have to be an accurate portrayal, just a character that represents some part of yourself that interacts with the boys. Often this gets done by accident in stories, so I am sure that we can do it on purpose. —Rowanne

  
**Apology Snippet  
by Shadowfox**

  
In the chilly basement office of a modest suburban home, we find an intense young fan-fic author pounding away on her computer keyboard; cranking out her latest submission for one of the six or so lists she is subscribed to. Her face is a mask of concentration as she tries to tune out a cacophony of background noise that begins with two young male voices, ages 4 & 8, screaming at each other in childish offense of whatever slight one of them has inflicted on the other, and ends with the voice of their father yelling down to our heroine _something_ about dinner... 

_SCREEEEEEEEECH!_ "MINE! MINE! I GON GO TELL MY _MOM-MA!!_ MOM MAAAA, MYAL TOO MY CAAARRR..." 

"MO-OM, HE WASNT EVEN _THINKING_ ABOUT IT UNTIL I PICKED IT UP..." 

"ALEX, YOURE OLDER THAN HE IS; GIVE HIM THE CAR AND FIND ANOTHER ONE TO PLAY WITH!!" 

THUMP!! "WHHHHAAAAAAAAAH! MAMYAL _HIME_..." 

Warning in her tone..."ALE-EX..." 

KA-THUMP!!! "MOOOOOO-OOOOOOM!!!!! ANDY JUST _BIT_ ME, AN I WASNT DOIN _NOTHIN_..." the injured party appears at the office door, cradling his ravaged appendage and wearing a pout. 

"Riiiight. Here, let me look...oh, jeez, you can barely even _see_ it—he didnt even break the skin! Youre _fine_ , Alex. Now go play. And be nice to your brother! DREW, STOP BITING ALEX!! YOU KNOW BETTER THAN THAT, LITTLE MAN!!" 

BOOM!!!!! _SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH!_ "MOM, I DIDNT DO IT!!! ANDY TRIPPED..." 

The younger of the two boys runs into the office and clings to our heroine tearfully, a stream of childish babble pouring from his lips. After assessing the extent of the damage..."TELL ME ANOTHER ONE, ALEX. NOW LEAVE DREW _ALONE_ BEFORE I KILL YOU; AND YOU DONT WANNA BE DEAD!!!!...you okay, sweetie?" getting a nod in return, "alright, go play now, and _no_ _biting_ ," and, temporarily soothed, the child runs off again. "Oh-kay, Mom-ma..." 

"BUT, MO-OM..." 

"NOT ANOTHER WORD! I NEED TO GET THIS _DONE_!!! OUT!!" 

Pouting even more at the injustice of his life,..."O-kaaay,....." 

Three minutes and several more angry screechs later (and Im surprised it took him _that_ long )... 

"MO-OM, CAN I GET..." 

"ALEXANDER MICHAEL!!!! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU TO KNOCK!!! OUT!!! OUT NOW!!!! AND STOP TORTURING ANDREW!!!!" 

"BUT MO-OM...," 

"I SAID _OUT!!!_ AND I MEAN _NOW!!!!!!!_ " 

Two minutes after _that_ , from the top of the basement stairs... 

"HEY, INTERNET QUEEN! WHATS FOR DINNER??" 

" _I_ HAVE NO IDEA! ORDER A PIZZA! IM BUSY RIGHT NOW!" 

In a semi-facetiously sarcastic, sorta pleading voice..."IF YOU WERE A _GOOD_ WIFE, YOUD COME UP AND ORDER IT _FOR_ ME...BUT NOOOO..." 

Frustrated..."JEEEEESUS, MIKE; YOURE A BIG BOY, YOURE MODERATELY EDUCATED, CANT YOU DO IT YOURSELF? Its not like you ever get anything but double cheese/double pepperoni, anyway..." 

Smug..."YOU KNOW YOU LOVE ME, BABY..." 

Muttering..."not right now, I _dont_...SURE, FINE, WHATEVER. GIMMIE A MINUTE..." 

Fifteen minutes later, calm is restored, pizza is on the way and our heroine is back at work. As a bonus, her muse has _finally_ decided to favor her with his fickle presence, draping his miniaturized black velvet panther body across the top of her monitor and licking a paw with lazy purpose... 

_Hey, Shadow. Whats shakin?_

"Dont you hey me. Where the hell have you _been_?" 

_Playing with my toys. And arent we the snarky one this evening?_

No _trace_ of apology there. Typical; just typical. If it werent for the fact that he was occasionally useful..."I think I have the right to be, since _you_ decided to leave me hanging out here on my own, which is just plain _rude_. Ive been dying a slow and painful death, Ill have you know! Youre supposed to be my _muse_ , Sascha. Youre supposed to be providing me with inspiration, not schtumping your MS5KD 24/7," the whole tirade carries an air of offended dignity to it. 

Which, of course, is completely ignored by the party its being directed at. _You mean thats _not_ inspiration?_ he asks with a smug lift of his brow. _I guess Ill just have to work harder, then._

"Dont. Start. Just dont," the last thing she wanted was to give him an excuse, so she gets to business instead. "What I _needed_ was an idea for a HAT/EOTH scene." 

_But thats _Vics_ department. Why did you need me?_

"Because Vic and the others are still not speaking to me after the Mr. XXX fiasco," on cue, the aforementioned glare their displeasure at her, signalling again that she had better find a way to fix that particular situation soon. "Like Im not paying for it every single day anyway," she mutters, thinking about the shelved RR waiting for a miraculous rise from the dead by Dr. Ruthless. She then heaves a disgusted sigh, "yeeeee-ikes, what a mess." 

A tall, blond, Nordic demi-god steps up behind her and gives her a reassuring hug, oblivious to the trios lustfully jealous stares. "Dont worry, Shadow. Well find a way to fix it. I promise," he follows up the statement with a kiss on the top of Shadows head. 

"Thanks, Hal," she allows herself a moment to relax into her latest acquisitions comforting embrace, then gets back to business when she sees her muse also scowling from his perch with glowing green eyes. "Anyway, theyre not talking and I owe Suze a fic. So I needed you about 20 minutes ago to help me start this puppy." 

_Needed? As in past tense?_ the tiny black velvet ears perk up at the inferrence that his services might not be required now. His sweet FoxSlut was waiting for him. 

"You got it, Skippy-cat. Im on a roll right now. But dont even _think_ about going anywhere just yet. This things gonna need your twisted touch. Im sure the Surly Ones taking very good care of him," she adds slyly, knowing how much it irritates her muse to be reminded of the chemistry between two of his favorite toys. 

_Hed better _not_ be or Im gonna eat him,_ is the darkly muttered reply. As predicted, Shadow hadnt been able to let go of the Skinner-clone, but no one could have predicted the amazingly perfect way the big guy had fit into the household. Or the way his FoxSlut had thrown himself at the others feet at first sight. The only reason the very butch A.D hadnt gotten himself eaten so far was because the normally cool muse had an unacknowledged jones for him as well. Hmmm, maybe a threesome wouldnt be a bad idea...hed have to talk to Vic—seeing as how his double was the resident expert, or maybe Hal—since he was also an expert _and_ already had a Fox of his own (and therefore probably wouldnt be interested in FoxSlut; then again, that tongue thing could corrupt the Pope...). 

Hes startled out of his musings by a deeply wicked chuckle from Shadow. "Yeah, right; tell me another one. By the way, the latest chapter of LFTA is up," she says slyly. 

Bus-ted. Damn, he thought hed covered his tracks better on that... _Dont. Start,_ he growls testily. Deciding hed be better off earning his keep, he peers over the edge of the monitor and starts reading. Then, disturbed by the decidedly RL content, he asks, Um, Shadow...are you sure you want to do it _this_ way? 

She grins evilly. "Ye-up. Why?" 

_Cause this is pretty...,_ he hesitates a moment, mindful of the explosion about to come, _MarySue-ish. As a matter of fact, this _is_ your life._ He hates to point out the obvious, but tact isnt necessarily his strong suit—making authors melt into a pool of rampant lust is. 

The explosion never comes. Instead, his mistress sounds well-pleased with herself. "I know." 

_What!?_ In his surprise, the muse reverts to human form; leaving him not only about six inches high, but also naked—save for an emerald studded collar, a treasured present from the late Dr. Ruthless. "But Shadow, you _never_ , _ever_ do MarySues. _E-ver_. You never even _discuss_ the _subject_ since your talk with Ori." 

The grin reaches Grinch-like proportions, "I know." She hands the stunned muse sitting cross-legged on her monitor a sticky note, "but in the aftermath of last week, I started thinking about the January Challenge and decided to give it a shot. The worst I can do is fall flat on my face, right?" 

The muse looks up from the pink piece of paper and whistles in amazement. "Youre not asking for _much,_ are you? When and where did you come up with _this_?" 

"At work on Thursday. Whatcha think?" 

"That youre certifiable. This is gonna be a bitch to pull off, by the by." 

" _That,_ dear muse of mine, is where _you_ come in. Keep reading." 

So he does..."well, it looks like youve got everything locked down tight here. Tell me again what the hell you _need_ me for?" 

" _Inspiration_ , Sascha, inspiration. So you might as well settle down and get to work. Comprenez-vous?" 

Taking his mistress advice to heart, the muse morphs back into feline form and resumes lounging on the monitor. _Youre the boss. Ive seen your job, and I dont want it._ It was gonna be a looooong night... 

Pleased with the instant capitulance, our heroine rubs her hands together gleefully. "Damn straight you don't. Now, let me seeeee—ah, yes, here we go..." 

* * *

..."Tai, you know I love Mac; but are you _sure_ this is necessary?" Vic eyed the steel bar, with attached padded leather cuffs and suspended chest-high, dubiously. "I mean, couldnt we just take him out, get him a great meal, a cheesy card and a sappy present; then take him home and screw him till he cant walk for a week?"... 

The End, for now...evil, arent I? Yes, your Ori-ness there _is_ more...be patient! 

* * *

FEEDBACK: [email removed]  
1/28/00   
Okay, Suze...I promised you a _proper_ apology, and here it is in all its twisted glory.   
Intro: Not so long ago (probably about the beginning of this month, I reckon), Mockery apparently came up with the idea for this months MarySue challenge—which, until now, was a subject I hadn't wanted to get into, being of the firm opinion that _all_ fictional characters could fall into that catagory in _some_ way, shape or form (if you like, Im willing to discuss the subject OFF-LIST, since it always seems to get me in trouble! ). Thus, to me, arguing about what does or does not make a character an MS is sort of a moot point. I simply see them as the individuals they are, and the fact that they are born of the womb of an authors imagination (and may or may not be the author in disguise) makes absolutely no difference to me.   
So, the genesis for this little tale went like this: I, feeling bad about the recent everything on the list and knowing I owed our very harried Ms. Sue a snip to make up for my part in it, decided I should just give in and do the JC, _my way._   
_This_ is the fruit of my labors (I am _so_ evil...bwahahahahahahaha...), and probably as close as I can come to deliberately writing an MS; I hope, my dear list sibs, that it does what I intended for it to do.   
Cheers,   
PS—This lovely little monster has no title (my brain was too fried to be that clever), very few bad words (if any), some nudity (if you can consider a six-inch high muse titilating, go for it!), and No Sex (sorry! my life is boring, that's why I write smut... ); and the brief appearance by Vic at the end doesn't even warrant a disclaimer. It would help if you have familiarity with the following to get some of the referrences: How The Mighty Have Fallen? (an RR with Suze, Krysa, Ori & me), Honour Among Thieves/Eye Of The Hurricane (an OAT-fic by me), and Slashing w/Mr. XXX (the Little Interactive Soap Opera That Could ). However, it's not an absolute must.   
Once more into the breach, dear friends...   
---


End file.
